Feeling worthless. Feeling like everything I am is tied to my weight and ability or inability to lose it. Feeling like I'm not as good as the next girl, the skinny one. Feeling like a failure. Feeling like I should be able to love myself no matter what size I am. Feeling like I should feel more successful after losing 50 pounds. Feeling like I wish the word "fat" had never been introduced into my vocabulary. Feeling like I just, for once, would like to feel truly happy with who I am and what I look like. Feeling pudgy and gross and just blech. Feeling edgy and irritated and short-tempered and like I am crawling out of my skin. Feeling like I just want a reset button on today.